All good things must come to an end, that’s how the old cliché goes. Nothing drives that home harder than discontinued beauty products. The hurt, the feeling of abandonment, that empty space in your soul the best leave-in conditioner once filled. Sometimes you get a heads up and can join the stampede of loyal fans to grab as much of whatever stock is left on the shelves. Other times there’s no warning at all, suddenly your favorite item is just… gone. No time for a backup plan, just lots of disbelief and gnashing of teeth. Today we share with you some of our favorites that now reside in the beauty graveyard.
My first makeup heartbreaker was Lancôme liquid eyeliner. I feel the salty sting of tears in my eyes to this day, y’all. This was pre-internet, back when dinosaurs roamed the earth, so I had zero warning that my beloved eyeliner had been retired. The most exquisite liquid eyeliner with the perfect brush was gone forever, replaced with some bullshit felt tip monstrosity. Clearly, I haven’t quite recovered.
My heart still aches for this next one, get ready for some serious drama. Picture it… 1998, I’m a goth Cher Horowitz browsing the makeup counters in a Beverly Hills department store. I’m approached by a dashing young man who wants to show me a new fragrance he thinks I’ll love, how right he was. Tocca’s Eau de Touch was my everything. I would go on to buy the whole collection: perfume, body oil, solid perfume, laundry wash, and the candles. I lived in olfactory bliss for years until the dark day when Touch seemed to disappear off the shelves and not be restocked. I actually wrote to the company to ask what was going on, and was told that they were in the middle of rebranding their fragrances and Touch would be back soon. In the meantime I purchased a couple of bottles on eBay (I don’t mess around) and waited with bated breath. Soon enough it was back! Reborn in a new bottle, but the same delicious and delicate fragrance, my heart soared. Until those bastards once again snatched my precious away from me. Tocca currently has thirteen fragrances – THIRTEEN. How can they have over a dozen stupid fragrances but feel it necessary to obliterate the original one?! Tocca is dead to me.
Too good to be true, gone too soon was Too Faced Buffed BB Cream. After finally succumbing to my curiosity, I let some black smocked professional at Sephora work their Color IQ magic on me. Give them a couple of minutes of your time and you’ll be rewarded with a list of near perfect color matches to explore. I found my perfect color soulmate with Too Faced Buffed BB Cream in Linen Glow. It was a little different than other BB creams, it was sort of a solid cream that you had to apply with a brush then blend into your skin. But it was worth the extra work, because it left my skin looking flawless and never felt heavy or caked on. In reading some reviews I see I was in the minority because the majority of the reviews give it a big fat “meh”. Too Faced has made up for it by coming out with Born This Way foundation, which better stick around or there will be a strongly worded email in their future.
This is really bumming me out, guys. I’ll wrap up my last lost love with Aveda’s Elixir leave-in conditioner, which I have yet to be able to replace. My mom’s stylist knew how obsessed I was with Elixir, so when she heard it was being discontinued she gave me her last bottle of the stuff. I stretched out the remaining conditioner for months! I was never able to find out why Aveda was taking it off the market, or maybe I did and I blocked it out. Whatever, I’m devastated. I got hooked on leave-in conditioners with Elixir, and I still haven’t found anything to take its place. The closest I’ve come is some really great hair masks, but I have to admit they aren’t quite as good as my OG Elixir.
Katy’s favorite discontinued item is Thermasilk, and she isn’t alone. I mentioned it to a few people who all did the same, “Awww, yeahhhhh…” wistful sigh thing. Thermasilk was heat activated, which meant that heat from a blow dryer or flat iron would make your hair look sleek and shiny. It was actually replaced by Sunsilk, but most fans have lamented that it was never as good as the original.
I understand getting rid of an unpopular item, but I can’t for the life of me see why companies do away with cult classics that have sizable followings. Are they just messing with us? Getting us hooked on the good stuff only to cruelly pull the beauty rug out from underneath us? I can’t help but imagine the big wigs watching us from their skyscraper offices, getting an evil little kick out of crushing us over and over again.